abah

السلام عليكم

greeting from Litratista.

              Pagi semalam, bangun je dari tido nak gi keje, aku tengok kat fon aku - "1 new message". pelik..pagi2 bute da ade yg msj. tapi tapeee...dengan mate rabak aku terus baca msj tu. mane tahu kalau2 awek aku nak bagi morning kiss ke. aku bukak. aku bace. aku diam. mesej dari seorang kawan, "ayah syafiq da meninggal" isinye. Inalillah.. bukan intent nak cari topik dull sbgai post even name page ni  'Living In Monochrome'. tapi saje. sebab mende ni yang aku ingat buat masa ni. kawan aku bagitahu yang ayah die meninggal pkul 4.30 pagi ari tu. tapi aku xtanye banyak, taw perasaan die mse tu macam mane. Maaf kawan, aku xdapat pegi. Al-Fatihah saje yang dapat dikirim dari jauh. moga2 dia dapat bersabar. biar die pergi, tapi die xkan jauh dengan kita. serius an aku kali nie? =) xla.. otometik aku teringatkan abah. jadi post ni tribute untuk sape2 yang bergelar ayah. so mungkin sebab tu aku rase kali ni mungkin aku x mengarut. orang lain ade ayah. aku ade abah. =) tapi dia dah pergi..as one big happy family, kitorang mmg rapat. jadi kadang2 'lost' of someone tu maybe bukan perkara seronok maupun happening. kan? kan? jadi, bile abah pergi. kitorang memang down. tapi kitorang epi..sebab die selamat tiba disana. InsyaAllah. Ade satu moment yang paling aku xboleh lupe dengan abah..aku da pernah cerita mnda ni..tapi bukan kt semua orang. sampai sekarang, aku still menangis kalau aku ingat balik moment nie. abah sakit da lame.  2 tahun die sakit telantar kt rumah. Tapi mase ni aku boleh nampak..betapa mama jage abah. setianye die.. makan..minum..mandi. okey skarang aku nak bagitau ape yg aku mksudkan tadi moment yang xkan aku bleh lupe..Kalau nak tahu hari jadi aku yang ke-16 pada 11.06.2006.. hari tu aku suapkan makanan ntuk arwah abah..arwah abah sakit parkinson dengan strok. die susah nak cakap..nak gerak pon susah..tapi hari tu..mase aku tengah suapkan dia, tiba2 dia tarik tangan aku. dia tarik aku rapat ke mulut dia. susah payah tangan dia pegang nak tarik aku. lepas tu die cakap "selamat hari jadi dik..." Ya Allah..besarnya kekuasaanMu Ya Allah.. die xleh gerak..xleh cakap..n die nyanyuk! tapi dia xlupa hari jadi aku.. lepas ucap tu, arwah abah cuma senyum..tapi aku nampak air mata dia mengalir. sedihnya aku masa tu..aku cuma diam. aku tahan. Dia betul2 usaha nak ucapkan hari jadi aku.. Bergenang air mata aku masa tu. Aku cuma diam.. Keesokan harinya, 12.06.2006 arwah abah dah xde. arwah abah meninggal sehari selepas ucapkan hari jadi untuk aku. anak dia.. Even sekarang air mata aku still bgenang teringatkan hari tu.. Aku bersyukur sangat2 dikurniakan abah sebgai seorang ayah. Abah, kitorang anak2 abah..mama..baik2 sje. semoga bah beroleh keberkatan di sana. Moga rohnya ditempatkan di kalangan orang2 yang beriman. Al-Fatihah.

بِاِسْمِ اللَّهِ الرَّحْمَانِ الرَّحِيمِ

الْحَمْدُ لِلَّهِ رَبِّ الْعَالَمِينَ الرَّحْمَانِ الرَّحِيمِ مَالِكِ يَوْمِ الدِّينِ

إِيَّاكَ نَعْبُدُ وَإِيَّاكَ نَسْتَعِينُ  اهْدِنَا الصِّرَاطَ الْمُسْتَقِيمَ  صِرَاطَ الَّذِينَ أَنْعَمْتَ

عَلَيْهِمْ غَيْرِ الْمَغْضُوبِ عَلَيْهِمْ وَلَا الضَّالِّينَ

...abah السلام عليكم

introduction lewat!

oet!!! 

aiyarkkkk....hahahha. lupe nk wat cam bse..

السلام عليكم

greeting from Litratista..

owkie, suda setel!

sebenarnye post ni ntok cover blik post2 yg sblom neyh..

kalo sape2 pasan, aku xwat pape intrduction pon sal blog neyh..

hahahah..same mcam blog sblom ni gak.

owkeyh2..1st pasal blog ni..

ni blog aku..diulangi..blog aku

so ape2 sahaje perkara or post lam blog ni mmg spenuhnye aku pnye. hahaha...

suke atau tidak....

kontroversi atau tidak..

aku punye suke..aku punye page.agi satu blog nie gak blog baru...

baru xbaru gk r..tpi mmg baru r...

 huh?? papela.. lagi satu..jgn tnye knape blog ni xbnyak sgt kaler.

ahahah..might seems so dull..but not 4 me..

kaler2 cam itam ngan putih pon da ckup bg aku. sbb aku da ade kaler aku sndri...

klo nk taw npe aku suke itam putih je, KLIK SINI.

to be continue...

.......okey, da continue da ni. hahhaha..sebenarnye bukan aku suke sangat ngan kaler ni dulu.. tpi sekarang pon  xsuke sangat sbenanye. tapi oleh kerane aku pnye blog, macam biase. aku punye suke. ni sbenanye 2nd blog aku. dulu da ade satu tapi dianak tirikan oleh aku. aku xlayan sangat. so bile da bukak balik rase macam blur je. so terus aku wat yang baru. yang ni la! skang ni sbenanye aku kat pejabat nie..haha. disebabkan tade keja so aku pon jenguk r tempat ni sekaligus nak mengarut kat dalam ni. sebabnye kalo aku mngarut kat dalam opis tade sape nk layan. hahaha. tengok?? kan aku dah cakap..aku mengarut. owkeyh aku memang suke mengarut.aku suke cakap tapi bukan ngan sume orang r. kadang2 aku cakap sorang2. kadang2 aku sorang2 dengar aku cakap. =) owkeyh! stop. cut dis crap. intent sebenar aku wat blog ni memang tu r. aku nak mngarut sorang2. yeah! dats it! owkeyh. gi lu. boss panggil.hahaha. ROGER.

if i die tonyte?

السلام عليكم

greeting from Litratista..

If I die tonight

What would I do

On my last day

I know I'd wake early

In the morn' for crack

Of dawn's last pray

Then prolly go for breakfast

Like I used to do

Fried kuey teow FAM

And roti canai at Raju's

With my boo

And friends from way back

Neighborhood homies

Extended fam

They only know me

As that same cat

With that shaved head

Rocking Cross Colors

Sneaks to school

Writin' rhymes at the back of class

Playing tricks on fools

Then I'd come back to the crib

Tidy up a bit

Y'all know my room's messy

Though classy

Start arrange my ish

Line up my shoes one by one

Start with Jordans

And end with them Air Force Ones

Put a Post-it on the tongue

Of each one

With the name of each dun

I think I know my homies

And who would want which one

Get on the phone

And holla' at everybody

It's nearly noon

Gots to have lunch

With the family

Then spend the last day

I don't know

Try do a million other things

Hoping somehow

Time will slow

I guess what

I'm trying to say is

Take everyday

Like it was your last

Work towards your dreams

Before you pass

And have a blast

While you at it

'Cause we don't know

When we go go

So make the best of it

Just keep it real to yourself

And to all people

If y'all lost somebody before

Remember there'll be a sequel

If I die tonight

You know it'll be alright

Just smile for me

Reminisce the fond memories

Well if I die tonight

I wonder

Where I'll be tomorrow

Nobody cry please

Push away the sorrow'

Cause I ain't been

The best of men

The best of friends

The best of mom

And daddy's last son

The best of anything

Tell her here's a last one

If I die tonight

Would I be forgiven

By all the people

I been slackin' with

When I was livin'?

Those who I hurt their hearts

Took advantage of

And even lied to

Hug you one last time

For forgiveness

Yeah I would like to

If I die tonight

Would you feel the loss?

Tomorrow would you dial

My number by accident

Then suddenly... pause?

If I die tonight

I wonder who would get

To keep my caps and shoes

Jerseys, even my little

Stuffed crocodile Coco too

Get my cell phone

Message everyone from A to Z

Tell 'em this ain't aca

He passed away last night

And pray he rest in peace

If I die tonight

Would you think of my room

When you see blue

Wanted to clean it up this morning

But then I never knew

If I die tonight

What would happen to her

How long would it take

Before she kissed another man?...

God damn...

At fast food joints

Would she still order

The same combo meal for two?

Things I wish I knew..

A cute lil' thing

To many eyes

To me you were simply

A beautiful thing

I tell no lies

We went from

Mere invisible friends

To pals real tight

Rendezvous up on the net

To chitty chat all night

I used to pick you up

Until you got your own ride

A slammin' two door whip

A grey 36-72Lookin' all slick

Remember when I asked why this

You said because it's real fast

So you can rush

To see your boy after class

The last timeWe met was '22 october

You left feelin' upset over...

somethingI can't remember...

When I was deep in my sleep

Your loss taught me

Not to take my friends for granted

Misunderstandings

Gotta slam it quick

Death you never plan it

You're sorely missed down here

Rest in peace

This too shall pass

But our true friendship will never cease...

Love...

OBSESI TANPA WARNA

Sometimes the heart sees what is invisible to the eye. 

A mother is she who can take the place of all others

captured by : Aca Litratista - "mom"

wish from a boy.."dear god, make me the kind of my daddy is.."
heard the wish, the father pray, "dear god..make me the kind 0f man my son wants me to be.."

captured by : Aca Litratista - "dad"

Now join your hands, and with your hands your hearts. 

captured by : Aca Litratista - "our moment"

It isn't enough for your heart to break because everybody's heart is broken now.

captured by : Aca Litratista - "journey"

dun walk in front of me, i may not follow. dun walk behind me, i may not lead. juz walk beside me n be my fren..
tribute to my lecturer, n of coz, my fren. Sir Qayyum. =)

captured by : Aca Litratista - "sir Q"

Love can be put off, never abandoned. 

captured by : Aca Litratista - "abandoned history"

Courtesy is the one coin you can never have too much of or be stingy with

captured by : Aca Litratista - "seling"

I live in that solitude which is painful in youth, but delicious in the years of maturity

captured by : shooter - "crowdie"

It's surprising how much of memory is built around things unnoticed at the time.

captured by : Aca Litratista - "back to da oldies"

A man's country is not a certain area of land, of mountains, rivers, and woods, but it is a principle and patriotism is loyalty to that principle.

captured by : Aca Litratista - "i'm malaysian, n i'm proud of it!"

The miracle is not that we do this work, but that we are happy to do it.

captured by : Aca Litratista - "smile"

dream as if u'll live 4eva..n live as if u'll die today

captured by : Aca Litratista - "alive"

Probably the happiest period in life most frequently is in middle age, when the eager passions of youth are cooled, and the infirmities of age not yet begun; as we see that the shadows, which are at morning and evening so large, almost entirely disappear at midday

captured by : Aca Litratista - "we own it!"

captured by : Aca Litratista - "waiting for da rain"

captured by : Aca Litratista - "once needed"

captured by : Aca Litratista - "once forget"

captured by : Aca Litratista - "silent"

captured by : Aca Litratista - "still"

captured by : Aca Litratista - "tinggal"

captured by : Aca Litratista - "pagi"

captured by : Aca Litratista - "old"

captured by : Aca Litratista - "pemancing pagi"

captured by : Aca Litratista - "Adam"

captured by : Aca Litratista - "rust"

captured by : Aca Litratista - "far away"

captured by : Aca Ltratista - "Lonely"

captured by : Aca Litratista - "masjid terapung kuala terengganu"

captured by : Aca Litratista - "abandoned"

kawan n sahabat

السلام عليكم
greeting from Litratista..

Baru doploh taon hidup..mcam2 da aku rase. mcam2 da aku jmpe.. mcam2 jgakla yg aku da knal. tpi doploh taon - xckup agi nk mnjdikan aku sorang manusia. doploh taon - xckup nk wat aku btol2 knal dunia..tpi even xbnyak, aku mgkin bleh pham cket2 ape yg org ckap tu 'realiti'.  pkataan pndek, tpi mcam2 leh cite ngan mnde ni. ahaha. dari kecik, smpai skrang..aku da knal serba sdkit psal hidup. tpi cam aku ckap td. bukan semua. salah satu yg aku taw, pasal 'kawan'. aku taw, tpi aku xpham sgt. pe yg aku taw? kawan - senang nk cari..tpi susah nk jmpe. kawan2 aku ramai..skola dulu..tyme abes skola..n skang kwan2 kt kolej. dok kt kolej ni 2 tahun lbeyh da wat aku knal cket2 pasal diorg. mcam2 prangai ade..haha. bg aku semuenye baek2..susah nk cari kwan2 mcam diorg. klo nk sbut sorg2 tu bnyak sgt..snang ckap..stkat yg aku knal..most of kwan2 aku mmg baik2..DPH part 5, DTM part 5..ur  da best!

sir Q, (me), adam, sopi, umie, kak effa, le'a, que

ckup stakat tu. ade org ckap kwan tu bkan mcam 'sahabat'. - satu g pktaan yg aku xpham sgt.   sahabat tu ape?  sesetengah org ckap jgak..smue sahabat tu ialah kwan..tpi bukan semue kwan tu bleh jdi sahabat.. pelik an? xlah..xpelik. sbb aku da rase. mcam2 da aku rase. aku ade kwan..aku ade teman..tpi sahabat? mngkin ade..aku sndri xpsti. takot nk mke sure sape sbnanye sahabat aku. mgkin aku ade rse spe2 tu sahabat aku, tpi mcam aku ckap tdi. aku takot nk taw..btol ke tu sahabat? bukan senang nk trime kalo kite dpat taw yg kite anggap sahabat tu, mgkin bukan sahabat yg kite cari. 

captured by : Aca Litratista

hahaha..bnyak pkataan "sahabat" yg aku gune kan? peduli ape aku..page aku. hahha. kawan2..mcam2 jenis aku ade..mcam2 prangai aku jmpe. n bile aku tgok kwan2 aku..aku taw, bukan smua mcam yg dianggap. yg org sangke buruk, bkan semuanye teruk..n yg org sangke baik, bukan smuanya baik. bnyak kali aku sedar yg kwan2 aku bukannye sahabat yg dmksudkan. aku sndri bukan yg tbaik, tapi aku mgharapkan yg terbaik dri kwan2 aku, yg bleh aku angkt mnjadi SAHABAT! Alhamdulillah..ade jgak yg bleh bimbing aku sorang due. ade mase aku sakit dsbabkan kawan sndri, ade mase aku sedih dsbabkan kawan sndri, ade mase aku perit mngenangkan kawan sndri. tpi aku xpnah mnyesal knal sape2. sbb semua tu ajar aku mcam2. ajar mcam mane nk pilih kawan, mcm mane nk knal kawan..n ape itu sahabat.

sahabat atau kawan?

"Perumpamaan teman yg baik & teman yang tidak baik ialah umpama wangi-wangian dan tukang besi. Adapun pembawa wangi-wangian, sama ada dia memberinya sedikit ataupun anda membeli daripadanya sedikit ataupun kamu dapat mencium dprdnya bau yang wangi. Manakala tukang besi, sama ada dia membakar bajunya ataupun kamu akan mencium dairpadanya bau-bauan yang busuk." sabda Nabi s.a.w.

sahabat bnyak mmbawa pengaruh dalam hidup ni, org bleh knal kite bile tgok kwan2 kite. even bg aku sndri. tpi mak aku pnah pesan, bkwanlah dengan sape2 pon..baik..buruk..asalkan aku pndai amek smua tu sbg pnduan ntok hidup ak sndri. aku pegang kate2 tu. tpi aku xnafikan ade jugak mase aku tlupe pesanan tu..aku mnyimpang. aku tlupe kawan mcam mane yg ptut aku ikot,,kwan mcam mane yg patot aku jadikan teladan. semua org dlam dunia ni ade mcam2 crita pasal 'kawan' dan 'sahabat'. macam aku jgak.. aku naaaak sgt anggap smua kawan2 aku sbg 'sahabat'.. tpi sekali aku rase, skali aku kene, aku da jdi ckup brhati2 nk pcayekan sape2, skali kprcayaan aku ilang, susah aku nk trime, susa aku nk pcaye balik. tpi aku xrase serik nk bkawan, sbb aku taw..ade bnyak pngajaran yg aku dpat dri berkawan. as long as aku pham amnde tu yg dinamekan 'kawan'. 

aku sndri bukan kwan yg baik..mcam aku ckap tdi, aku sndri xtaw aku ni jenis kwan yg mcam mane. kwan yg bnyak bwak pedoman ataupun beban?

hari2 yg aku lalui kt kolej ni, aku dpat amek sdkit sbnyak pngjaran dri kawan2 aku..makin mngkat umo ni, mkin aku sdar, pe yg aku nk dri bkawan. mgkin rmai yg da sedar, cari sahabat xsesenang mcm nk cari kawan..

kawan- org cakap teman tyme senang je. tpi sahabat - org ckap tyme suka duka.

btol ke x mnde ni..aaaaaaku xtaw. pnglaman aku bnyak lam berkawan, tpi xckup bnyak ntok paham mnde tu. aku harap satu ari nnti aku btol2 paham. aku harap jgak, even bkan skarang, bile2 nnti..mgkin satu mase aku akn jadi sahabat buat kawan2 aku. 

sbb bg aku, klo nak seseorang sahabat kite, kite kne jadi sahabat seseorang tu dulu.

tu yg aku rase r...tpi bkan ntok smua cndition. sbb ade jgak..bile kte da cube nk jadi sahabat sesorg tu, xmstahil die sndri akan tikam kite ntok ksenangan die. ni mnde yg aku da rase. mgkin aku xpnah jadi ckup baik ntok bkwan dgn sape2..mngkin jgak.

tpi stiap ari yg blalu..aku salu cube ntok jadi yg tbaik ntok kawan2 aku. mcam mane aku nak sorg 'sahabat', mcam tu jgakla aku nk org anggap aku..-sbg sorg 'sahabat'.

captured by : Aca Litratista (cerita photo)

dri yg aku tgok..kawan ni ckup bbeza bila ddepan n dblakang kite..mcam ade 'double personality'. boley tuka2..skjap bleh jadi baik ngan kite..tpi bile kte xsdar, diowg leyh ckap mcam2 pasal kite. ni smue mnde yg aku tgok sndri..mgkin tnpe sdar aku pon mcam tu jgak. whut goes around, cames around. 

aku sndri.bnyak salah yg aku buat kt kawan2 aku, sdar atau xsdar.. so myb tu antare pnybab ntok ape yg aku dpat dri sesetengah kawan2 aku. ape pon trime kasih ntok kawan2 aku...sbb da bnyak ajar aku mcam2..da bnyak bg aku moment2 yg myb susah aku nk dpat ngan org laen... n ntok sahabat aku, till death do us apart.

awful truth

السلام عليكم
greeting from Litratista...
living. even for a while brings many things to me. it bring meanings, embraces ol of da facts. in a very sudden way,it can change to be the worst disasters. not the lifes, but to me myself. talking bout 'while', it is not very cmmon in our consideration. talking, arguing, should be the 'sudden' fact of that prty damn shit condition! fear to be demolished, fear to be abandoned, fear to be alone is wht i should call 'partners' when facing this. hahaha..awful truth. i guess.

captured by : Aca Litratista

 been lonely for a moment, and being accmpanied by sumone for a blink, shows me sumthin'.life should be easy, n for a certain cndtion, it could be worse. whtever it takes, its obviously dpend on me. Even peace may be purchased at too high a price. hahaha. damn! awful i guess. smbdy said, dun u eva t8 da life seriously, u'll nver get out of it alive. hahaha...damn quotes! Who will tell whether one happy moment of love or the joy of breathing or walking on a bright morning and smelling the fresh air, is not worth all the suffering and effort which life implies. Dreams have only one owner at a time. That's why dreamers are lonely. shout it out! i'd rther to be a dreamer. dreams should be more fun than actual life. even the nightmare itself. life is half spent bfore we know whut it is about. get used to it. haha..but beware...life, is an art of drawing wthout an eraser..but dun wurry, "While there's life, there's hope."  so, paint ur life as we THINK them, not as we SEE them. get ur life, such a drawing, a picture. it worth thousands words. nver t8 it as a poem. bcoz poem is nver finished, it olweys abandoned!! feel it guys. Every man dies. Not every man really lives. think bout it.